Is change always good

by Jun 1, 2020Becoming a Wise Woman

It will happen anyway, so you may as well embrace it.

Just lately, I have been thinking about change. Some of the people close to me have been going through significant changes, and it has got me thinking about what makes me happy, how I can feel more content in life and looking at what I have to change to make this happen.

I have been through some significant changes in the last few years. I have moved town twice, retrained, changed my job, and moved in with my partner. Things have changed a great deal, and mainly for the better. Yet still, some things could be better, and I would like to make this happen.

We have an odd relationship with change; it can be scary. We are told that change is a good thing and that we should strive to change ourselves, our lives and our circumstances if we are not happy with them. But is this always a good idea?

Is change good or bad?

Is change always a good thing? If you are unhappy with something, should you change it? What about changes that are forced on you, such as losing a job or a partner?

What would you call a ‘good’ change? Is it one you initiated yourself, or that turned out well? How about bad changes? Are they the ones that were forced on you or ones that did not improve your life?

There are different types of change. We have no control over some traumatic changes, such as the death of a loved one or losing your job. More trivial changes, like a change in the style of your favourite jeans or Facebook changing the way it shows posts, you also have no control over, but they aren’t going to change your life; they are just irritating.

But what about the changes we make happen, those we have some control over?

It depends on why we are changing. If you change your hair colour because you are bored, this is ok. It is easy enough to change it back if you don’t like it. Changing your partner because you are bored may not be the best way to solve your problem. There may be a better way.

Change itself is neither good nor bad. It is how we anticipate and cope with it that matters. Our attitudes to change differ significantly; some people thrive on it, while others are terrified.

The thing with change is that it will happen if we want it to or not.

Change for the sake of change can become a habit if we always think that the ‘grass is greener’. If you are changing something because you are unhappy, you need to consider whether that change will make us happier or if you are running away from a problem.

Before making significant changes, we should look closely at why we want this change and the consequences. This will ensure that we create positive changes for the right reasons. When changes are forced on us, we must accept them and consider how to make the most of them. It is much better to use them to help us grow instead of fearing them and looking at the adverse effects.

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How change can make us better

For most of us, change means stepping outside our comfort zone. But embracing change can make us better people.

    • It can help us to grow.
    • Makes us stronger
    • Make us more flexible
    • It brings us new experiences
    • It challenges you
    • Shakes up our routines
    • Brings new opportunities

What am I going to do?

woman in a van enjoying being by herselfTherefore, I will see where I feel most dissatisfied and how to improve it. This will include the following steps:

    1. Looking at my limiting beliefs and negative thoughts
    2. Challenging them before I can make any changes.
    3. After this, I will decide what it is I want from this area of my life
    4. Then finally, how I intend to make it work.

It won’t be easy, but it will give me something to aim for in the long term, making my life more fulfilling.

How about you? How do you feel about change, and how do you think it has improved your life? Is there anything you would like to change?

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